As Salaam Alaikum,
::sighs:: Don’t know what I am going to do today. I guess that I can work on my business. Matter of fact, I will. I’ll train my mom with the camera and laptop. It’s not too bad and I hope that it is not complicated for her.
I miss my husband so much. I miss him sooo much. He is suppose to call my mother at the end of August to tell her what he wants to do. This is pretty much torture because I would just hate for my mother to sit me down and tell me that he is never coming back. I just love him so much and he is truly my everything. It’s like everything is even more complicated now because I imagine that he feels obligated to his parents to help them move and settle cross country.
My mother talked to him yesterday about stuff and she said that he was listening. I don’t know if he was serious when he was speaking to her. I just hope that he sees how much I love him with all of my heart. I hope that he really meant it when he told her that he knew he was being harshed to me when he was saying such horrible things. I hope he didn’t mean those horrible things. I hope that he truly loves me and wants to be with me.
I just don’t want to give up on us at all. I love him so much and I know that he sees that. He has to see that. When people are upset they do stupid things, and again I was only calling his did for help. I was crying so hard in front of him that day and just begging for him to come home.
I love my husband and I just want to be a better wife and everything.
I hope he doesn’t call and tell my mother that he doesn’t want to reconcile. I hope that he doesn’t move such for a way.
I know that he has logged in his facebook, so he’s seen my comment telling him how much I love him and even my letter. Everyday I wake up hoping that he hasn’t removed me from his list of “friends” or ended our “relationship status”.
I love my husband so much and he just knows that I would do anything. I support him so much in his dreams and I will do anything I have to do to change. I love him.
My eyes are so sore from crying. I think that I have cried enough, at least my eyes are done balling out crying. I only manage a little tears. But the pain is still inside.
I managed to get through the night of sleeping! I woke up for fajr and went right back to bed.
I just pray and pray.
Filed under: God, seperation
